Monday, March 14, 2011

Suckers Are Still Available



















Dateline: Portland, Oregon. March 14, 2011.

HEY, Let's pay money to 'get motorvated' by Rudy, Bradshaw, and LAURA BUSH in Portland's Rose Garden Arena with thousands of other paying suckers, err... motivated Americans chasing skins. Sales pitches between genius millionaires makes a motivated American proud to be fleeced, err... inspired by America's Mayor, a genius Quarterback ...and the real First Lady. Cough it up, $99 will buy your dreams if you act before the tent stakes are pulled up! Hurray hurray! If only I attended this epic sellout snake-oil, errr motivate America to RICHES BEYOND YOUR WILDEST DREAMS! LEAVE YOUR CUL-DE-SAC LOSER NEIGHBORS BEHIND! Jesus Fucking Christ in a polyester suit and a headset mike. Preying on the desperate is an American tradition, PT Barnum would be proud. Some type of lemming or fire ant or wasp or suburbanite metaphor would really be appropriate right about now. These people paid "pornographically wealthy"* millionaires their grocery and kid's shoe money for this. Fraud is no longer a crime. Now get back to the suburbs in your mini-vans, and wait for your Terry Bradshaw McDreams to die.

note: Former Mayor of Portland Bud Clark, pictured above, is the antithesis of these douchebags.

*quote from a C-SPAN Washington Journal viewer.